ive been sitting been waiting i am a fool for what i think is real..for what i think is long lasting i try to escape in my mind but my mind is full of all the things i adore that bring my all my suffering and ive come to feel so lost in myself i cant imagine if what i feel is real anymore if there is no pain it must not be ..that is what has me going it is what lefts me know i am alive and it is the sadness that cannot escape from and it will consume me as it does each time i try to run and try to evade..i am trapped in the never ending maze or confusion and isolation of myself ..from the ones that love me ..only to throw myself at those th